Pulling me deeper

It’s a darkness

It’s full of pain

I know what lies inside

I pull myself together, block all the dark thoughts

Close my eyes

Breathe deep with the hope the pains goes away

Sigh, everything is still the same

My wandering mind settles in thoughts of him again

How do I push them away

It just keeps getting worse

There is nothing good to him

Then why do I get pulled towards him again

Is it the attention I seek

Or the idea of him being just mine.