Tag: readers

Time to Move

~ Nuraine Sadaf ~ Leave a comment

Somebody knocks on the ceiling. I look up in confusion. I wait for the knock again but there’s only silence.

I say, “Hello?”

Silence.

Then there’s a sudden loud thud on the door. I nearly jump out of my skin almost dropping my glass of milk.

I open the door and see a box of cookies at the doorstep.

I bring it inside and hear a knock on the ceiling again and this time it is accompanied by a voice, “Knock knock.”

“Who’s there?”, I ask

“Orange.” says the voice

“Orange who?”, I ask again.

“Orange you glad you’ve a box of cookies to go with that milk!”

Educated by Tara Westover

~ Nuraine Sadaf ~ 6 Comments

Memoir|Self-help|Inspirational|Family

Book Review

Educated, is a memoir written by Tara Westover. Before I begin the book review I have to say that I am in awe of Tara, she is my hero and I aspire to be as brave, determined, and confident as her, someday.

This book recounts Tara’s experiences of growing up in a Mormon survivalist family that is always preparing to survive an Apocalypse. Tara does not get a proper education until the age of seventeen as her father believes that the public health and education system are corrupted by the Illuminati. Stuck between the curiosity of exploring the outside world and the confusing dominating views of her family, Tara has a troubled childhood. At the age of seventeen, Tara finally decides to join school and get an education. The path of self-discovery from hereon, though not smooth, slowly brings a profound change in her life.

“My life was narrated for me by others. Their voices were forceful, emphatic, absolute. It had never occurred to me that my voice might be as strong as theirs.”

Tara’s life begins at the Buck’s Peak mountain in rural Idaho. She lives an isolated life with her Mormon family. Her father is paranoid, extremely religious and owns a metal junkyard. Her mother is a midwife and later gains recognition as a herbal specialist.

Tara is the youngest child and has six siblings – Tony, Shawn, Tyler, Luke, Richard, and her sister Audrey. The children are expected to work at the junkyard with their father from a very young age. They are loosely homeschooled by their mother. Tyler, was the first child who takes serious interest in studies and decides to leave home. Tara being close to Tyler feels betrayed when he leaves her. Soon, Tara like the rest of her siblings is expected to work at the junkyard.

The children face multiple accidents at the junkyard but they are never taken to the hospital, all injuries are attended to by their mother. Luke gets burned while working with his father, Shawn has multiple accidents at the junkyard and while riding his motorcycle, Tara injures her neck in a car accident, Tara’s mother has a serious brain injury, but every time the father refuses to take any of them to the hospital for treatment. He believes that it is all a part of God’s plan and they can only be healed by Him. Tara also faces abuse from her violent elder brother, Shawn, soon she starts believing that her actions must be sinful for which she is being punished.

“It’s strange how you give the people you love so much power over you.”

I often had my hand over my mouth or I found myself on the edge of my couch while reading about these horrifying accidents. But all these incidents do not dampen Tara’s spirits, she keeps going, keeps trying and believing that only she can make her life better. It takes tremendous amount of courage to continue on a path that is explicitly forbidden by your family. While reading the book, I could feel Tara’s state of mind being torn between her family and her idea that she controls her life. Tara through self-education passes the ACT examination and joins BYU. Her dedication, interest and enthusiasm to learn new subjects eventually earns her a doctorate in history at Cambridge University.

“He said positive liberty is self-mastery—the rule of the self, by the self. To have positive liberty, he explained, is to take control of one’s own mind; to be liberated from irrational fears and beliefs, from addictions, superstitions and all other forms of self-coercion.”

Not everybody has it easy. Children expect love and support from their families, they believe that their parents always know best and they grow up trusting them. But, every family has a different way of raising kids. Just because Tara’s parents did not bring her up in a conventional way does not mean they did not love her. All the tough times and trauma that the children face made them stronger. Despite the hardship, there is nothing that they cannot possibly do if they set their minds to it. The fact that Tara could articulate about the trauma and abuse that she faced in her childhood reflects how strong she is physically and emotionally. Her past experiences might have broken her many times, but she is now living her life on her terms and this is why she is a real trooper.

The reason this book feels personal is because each of us have been put in a situation where we feel like an outsider and do not know any of the rules. Her story is inspiring because of her absolute self-belief and determination to continue down the path that she has chosen. We can all draw on Tara’s strength while in a similar predicament. Educated, is a wonderfully written memoir by Tara Westover and I consider it a must-read!

“To admit uncertainty is to admit to weakness, to powerlessness, and to believe in yourself despite both. It is a frailty, but in this frailty there is a strength: the conviction to live in your own mind, and not in someone else’s.”

“But vindication has no power over guilt. No amount of anger or rage directed at others can subdue it, because guilt is never about them. Guilt is the fear of one’s own wretchedness. It has nothing to do with other people.”

Tara Westover

A Walk Down the Street

~ Nuraine Sadaf ~ Leave a comment

A narrow unevenly tarred road.

Every day I walk on this street, hurriedly, trying not to attract too much attention while also silently observing the variety of events that happen on it every single day.

A woman washes clothes on a stone slab outside the door.
A man wearing a checkered lungi stands on the terrace brushing his teeth.
A tiny naked girl with uncombed hair is crying near her mother while the mother inattentively washes dishes.
A man is sitting on the bike with his friend standing beside him, smoking a cigarette while staring at people/women/me making us uncomfortable.
A small tailor’s shop has a bright yellow public phone booth. The shop is empty most of the time but there is always someone on the telephone. I wonder if the tailor listens to everybody’s conversations.

There are many small cement and brick houses on this lane which are painted in awkward bright colors – mint green, psychedelic purple, electric blue, some are not painted at all, and some houses are so old that the paint has faded and chipped off years ago.

In the midst of these fractured buildings, a tall apartment with a massive gate is randomly positioned breaking the entire rhythm. A little ahead is an open ground which is used by buses and truck drivers for parking but during the day it is usually empty.

A temple around the corner fills the street with the smell of marigold flowers and incense sticks. As I get closer, I hear the sound of bells and prayer chants.

I take a right, reach the main road, and disappear in the crowd of a busy street.


My Sister, the Serial Killer – Oyinkan Braithwaite

~ Nuraine Sadaf ~ 1 Comment

Crime|Dramedy|Unsettling|Family

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My Sister, the Serial Killer, is a story of two sisters, Korede and Ayoola. Ayoola kills and Korede protects. This pretty much sums up the entire story.

What makes it interesting to read is the unique narration by Oyinkan Braithwaite, where a dark theme is narrated with a comic element. Though a short novel, you cannot help but get involved with the characters.

Korede, the elder sister is a nurse by profession. She is reliable, hard-working, and fiercely protective of her younger sister. At the same time she is also resentful of her sister’s flawless beauty.

Ayoola is a carefree, happy-go-lucky soul who always gets what she wants and she is used to men falling in love with her beauty almost instantly. She is extremely close to her sister and shares all her secrets with Korede, including the murders of her boyfriends.

Every time, Ayoola kills a man, she summons her sister by saying, “Korede, I killed him.” As always, Korede goes running to save Ayoola and tries her best to clean up her mess. But, what happens when Korede’s long love interest, Tade, falls for Ayoola’s beauty too? Will she save her sister or Tade?

My Sister, the Serial Killer, is Oyinkan Braithwaite’s debut novel. It is a dark comic fictional story which is easy to read and the story flows really well. At first, you feel the storyline does not progress beyond Ayoola’s beauty, how she is the favorite child, and Korede though being smart always feels worthless. But soon, the story picks up pace, a lot more characters come into the picture and the story evolves.

When Korede finds out that, “More than three murders makes you a serial killer”, she is clearly frightened and worried for her sister. Ayoola’s merry disposition after committing the crimes makes it all the more weird. Introducing another character in the story, Muhtar – a coma patient, who is Korede’s only source of comfort and companion with whom she shares all her secrets and thoughts.

My Sister, the Serial Killer, deals with crime, loyalty, love, an abusive father, and gender roles. This tale also has undertones of self-worth, dependency and frustration with Korede always feeling that she is a step behind Ayoola. It is about family-ties, where both the sisters feed off each other and are equally guilty of their crimes. Ayoola for committing them and Korede for hiding them. Like the author herself says, “They are two sides of the same coin.” This book is a quick, fun, and interesting read.

Asymmetry by Lisa Halliday

~ Nuraine Sadaf ~ 2 Comments

#BookReview

The book Asymmetry by the new author Lisa Halliday evoked many mixed emotions. I couldn’t say I really liked the book neither can I say that it was terrible.

The book started off really well with Mary-Alice, a young editor, sitting at a park bench beside a supposedly popular writer. His identity is hidden for the first ten pages. However, when the “famous writer” Ezra Blazer’s name is thrown randomly in the middle of the story, it makes you wonder why was his identity hidden if he was going to be introduced so lamely.

The absurd relation between the aged writer, Ezra and Mary-Alice can sometimes be uncomfortable to read when the author writes so crassly about their intimate moments like when Alice asks Ezra over a phone call if he wants to meet for a “Fucky Fuck?”. Some parts in the book just lack refinement, there is a paragraph on farts, a random woman retching in the subway, and many such weird inclusions that are absolutely unnecessary.

Asymmetry includes three parts: Folly, Madness, and Ezra Blazer’s Desert Island Discs.

Folly is mostly about the confused relation between Ezra and Alice. Madness gives an insight about the Iraq war and the daily struggles of Iraqis. The last part in the book is an elaborate interview of Ezra Blazer who discusses his personal life, his experiences and interests.

There are certain extracts in the book which are interesting to read and well-written. However, the book is extremely abstract, it lacks character development and makes it hard for the readers to connect with the story. Also, the exhaustive details about the unimportant characters in the book makes it very tedious to read.

The concept of including the difficult circumstances of Iraq, the war, and the determined efforts and hopes of Iraqis to achieve peace was interesting to read but somewhere the story again loses it’s impact when the author switches back and forth from the past to the present to the memories of the characters, and to the detailed unnecessary descriptions. I was hoping till the end that there would be some kind of an obvious link between the three parts of the book and that the characters, Mary-Alice, Ezra, and Mr. Jafaari would somehow get connected but the story just ended and left me disappointed. The author’s attempt of writing about justice, power, and geography turned out to be more of a mess and confusion.

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*If you have read the book, Asymmetry and liked it and can give me an insight about something that I could have possibly missed in appreciating the book, then please comment below and share your thoughts. I would love to know what you think about the book. 

A Storm Within

~ Nuraine Sadaf ~ Leave a comment

A red blazing spark of light shot down from the dark clouds that turned up out of nowhere. The sharp crackling sound of thunder got my heart racing. I had never seen anything like this before.

Wait, did I just see two human forms in the clouds with swords? Or were they only birds? The lightning must have blurred my vision!

The red lightning struck again! I quickly roll down the window of my cab to look up at the sky. I see a whirlpool forming. The clouds start drowning into the vast darkness of the whirlpool.

It looks like a portal. I have seen sci-fi films and read many fantasy books, always wishing out-of-ordinary instances like these would occur someday to make life extraordinary. However, this was not fiction, it was happening for real, I could see a portal in the sky!

This cannot be true. I stare at it without blinking my eyes. I can feel my heart sinking, drowning in fear but unable to react.

“Is it only the sky or will we all get absorbed into the darkness of this portal?”, I whisper to myself.

I am not quite sure how I feel at this very moment, I am not crying out in fear neither am I panicking. I guess shock has taken over my emotions and all I can do is gape with my mouth wide open at the flying humans in the sky and the red storm approaching through the open whirlpool.

Inquisitive is probably how I feel. I do not want this storm to consume me neither do I want it to stop, I wonder what this miracle is! How can I say that I want it to stop? Monotony of life has gotten deep into my skin, I shouldn’t be complaining. A supernatural phenomenon like this has never happened before, I should make the most of it!

In a flash, I decide to jump out of the cab to marvel at the rarity of this occurrence. I need to remember this, I need to write it down, sketch it, or wait..the fastest way to capture this moment is to click a photo. So, I look down to hunt for my phone in my bag and I suddenly realize the entire world just stopped.

Feeling dazed, I look around to find myself in the middle of a bustling street. Cars start honking and people step out of their shops and cars to look at me, and then I see my cab driver running in panic towards me. Everyone looks as startled as I am. I look at them and immediately look up at the sky. Nothing. It’s a bright sunny day!

I stand horrified in the middle of the street holding a book in my hand, The Words of Radiance by Brandon Sanderson.

reflection of clouds on body of water
Photo by Johannes Plenio on Pexels.com

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